Attention, OAV members.
The next OAV President, presently codenamed F, is coming for a surprise inspection of the Society. All members are required to attend a special debriefing session at Edamame (the Japanese restaurant on Holywell Street) at 5:45pm on Friday 6 June. Bribes may, but are not guaranteed to, help you pass the loyalty testing phase of the session.
Survivors will be permitted to attend the subsequent OAV meeting, which will take place as normal.
Afterwards, there will be cake.
Greetings, loyal mangaphiles.
A message from loyal AnimeSoc member (who never turns up) Alex Paynter:
Greetings, fellow mourners.
I'm sure you are by now all aware of the death of one of OAV's most beloved characters. He was a staunch supporter of the good fight, a seeker of justice who was prepared to lay down his life to stop Kira, and who was ultimately defeated by a supernatural force he could not anticipate or counter. This Saturday, we gather to mourn that hero of Death Note.
That's right. This Saturday, between 1pm and 5pm at the Harris Lecture Theatre of Oriel College, we will convene to hold a funeral service for Shiroba Ito, the brave motorcycle policeman who fell in the attempt to prevent Higuchi from breaking traffic laws.
To commemorate his sacrifice, we will be showing the second arc of Death Note in its entirety. Attend, and find out once and for all whether Shiroba Ito's sacrifice was in vain, and who shall be the ruler of this new world.
Dear OAV Members,
The previous e-mail was a hoax designed to capture a suspected mole who was feeding information to the Rei Ayanami Wannabe Cult.
The operation was a success. We are pleased to announce that the real location of next week's meeting is the Platnauer Room in Brasenose College, and the earlier mention of the HLT was merely a ruse to catch the suspect out.
Dear Members of the elite Vandread Prevention Squad,
I would like to open by reminding you of the utmost secrecy of our operation. The VPS and other branch groups of the OAV Secret Police cannot function effectively unless we avoid public scrutiny. Therefore, please do not share the information in these e-mails with anyone, and above all do not forward it to the Groupspaces mailing list or any other OAV comms system.
Greetings, applicant wishing to join the Kira Task Force.
Your application form is below. Please fill it in clearly and return to our temporary headquarters at the Harris Lecture Theatre, Oriel College, no later than 8pm on Friday 9th May.
Attention, fellow part-time employees of the Ichihara Yuuko wish-granting shop.
We would like to remind you that an employee skills seminar will take place this Friday at 8pm at the Platnauer Room of Brasenose College. Topics will include
- "Identity theft: keeping your true name secret" (host: Ryuuzaki)
- Complicated love triangles as a motivator for superior performance, or "please don't hold me back a year!" (host: Harima Kenji)
- Changing careers in the private sector (host: Okajima Rokuro)
And a special presentation on dealing with conflict in the workplace by Kiryuu Nanami and her charming assistant Chu-Chu. Audience members in the front rows are reminded that they may get wet, and should take advantage of our bloodstain-removal deal after the seminar's conclusion.
Greetings, fellow vampire hunters and/or vampires.
I hope that you enjoyed your mandatory death-and-resurrection-celebration-related vacation, and are ready for a new term of anime goodness.
Greetings, assorted victims.
Thank you, all those who took part in the voting on our forum. The poll is now closed, and the results are as follows:
Attention, loyal worshippers of the God of Fanservice who has recently annexed Utena into his domain.
This coming Friday, we will be gathering in a memorial service to Vandread, recently departed high priest of Fanservice. At 5:30, we shall assemble at Edamame, the Japanese restaurant on Holywell Street, and commemorate the passing of Vandread with a solemn meal together. Anyone arriving after 5:45 may be unable to get a seat due to the sheer number of Vandread fans in attendance, so come early.
After thus mourning, we shall hold the wake at G&Ds, eating ice-cream as colourful as the hairstyles of the Vandread characters, and thence depart unto our usual meeting.
Greetings, fellow Denizens of the Crimson Realm.
Attention, loyal worshippers of YALORT.
You are in terrible danger. Depending on your actions, for the rest of the year you could be stuck with a series about:
- An army sergeant with a furry fetish
- Gory and violent battles between characters from games you probably haven't played
- Cthulhu versus mecha, chosen by the owner of Vandread and described by some as "Vandread squared"
- a distant future where all proper nouns (names etc.) are in an incomprehensible alien language whose spelling and pronunciation are unrelated
The deadline is midnight this Thursday. Before that time, go to the forum and place your vote to choose the lesser of these four evils to replace Vandread. There's no time to lose.
Attention, fellow cultists of the Big Rock.
Happy Valentine's Day, fellow victims and victims-to-be of Cupid.
Attention, loyal fangirls. (male members may be considered honorary fangirls for the purpose of this e-mail)
This is an advance warning. The Utena marathon WILL overrun. This is in part because AnimeSoc always starts late due to certain people invariably not turning up on time, but in a large part because no two sources agree on the length of the Black Rose Saga we're meant to be showing. So it could be anywhere between 10 and 13 episodes.